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Author Topic: Need an outside perspective  (Read 146 times)
Walcingham
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« on: December 25, 2009, 09:40:46 PM »

 Hi so I could use some advice here, I'll start with a little back story.
 So about 8 months ago this new girl started at my work, and something just clicked in me. She's shy so it was rough-going getting to know her but eventually we started getting along and even doing the sort of playful teasing thing. At one point we exchanged numbers and here and there we text one another but not on a regular basis. She came out for the tail-end of my birthday shenanigans and there are times where I think she may actually be into me. Two weeks ago we had our staff Christmas party, we were all a little tipsy but not flat-out drunk. At one point she came up to me and called me attractive twice, but we were in front of other co-workers so I didn't say anything. Then after I got home she called me and we talked for about 30mins, about nothing really but it was definitely not something that happens very often. After that things seem to be different between us at work, like there's sort of a distance between us. I've always been apprehensive about asking her out because we do work together and if things go south it could be awkward and she is 22 years old and I'm 26, not that I'm really concious of my age but she might be. On an unrelated matter I may be leaving this job for another in the next two months or so. I'd really appreciate any advice on this matter that anyone would have, my friends tend to give me the same responses to this problem so I'm looking for outside perspectives.
-Thank you
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« Reply #1 on: December 26, 2009, 03:40:36 AM »

Well, I don't feel that the age difference is an issue.  If you are leaving this job, you might want to talk to her about your feelings and where you stand.  It sounds like the girl might be into you and could be put off by your lack of response to her advances.

Relationships at work can be awkward and a can of worms, so as far as how that goes it is your personal decision In my opinion.

I feel that in this situation the ball is in your court.

Hopefully others can give you better / more advice.

  Please keep us updated
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WARNING:: I am a typical guy, my advice is not to be taken as fact and should be considered bad advice.  So take my dating advice at your own risk.
catrina
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« Reply #2 on: December 26, 2009, 04:03:38 AM »

it sounds like she is giving you mixed signals.  perhaps her teasing /flirting is an invitation for you to officially make the first move.  sure you do work together, but you can't let that stop you.  if things should happen to go bad, then you are both adults right?  you can move on without it getting too messy i hope.  but as far as not dating simply because of the work arrangements, there really shouldnt be a problem there at all.  as long as you aren't her boss or something.  besides, if you are going to be leaving the job, then what's the hold up?  get to it!  talk to her and see if she is as interested as she seems to be.  good luck!
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Walcingham
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« Reply #3 on: February 28, 2010, 03:50:08 AM »

Ok so bit of an update, I asked her out last Thursday to dinner, the response was "what day?" which threw me off. I said "I dunno" because I was leaving work to head off for a mini vacation but I said for next week. I got back yesterday and called her, it went to her voicemail, and I told her my availability and for her to tell me hers. She left last night to go visit her parents for a couple of days and have not heard back from her. I realise I kinda bulloxed up the asking out, but what should I do now? Should I wait til she gets back to work and see what she says (or doesn't say)? Or should I bring it up again? It wasn't quite the response I was expecting but I dunno. I really suck at this sort of thing if you couldn't tell haha.
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